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David Orges

Passive Parenting

Passive parenting is what you're teaching your kids when you're not teaching your kids. Confused? That's cool, just keep reading. It'll make sense.


Any way you slice it, parents (you) are by far the most important, impactful, and influential people in the life of their own children and teens. Full disclosure here, I'm the Executive Pastor at my church and I worked in youth/student ministry for 15 years prior to that. The church is an incredible resource! A good church, with intentionally designed programs and a life changing message can come along side you and be a great to support your family, but parents play an absolutely irreplaceable role in the life of their child or teen that absolutely nobody else can.

Not convinced? Let's get a little nerdy and look at some statistics:

When you see the difference, you might feel inspired. You might feel a little bit overwhelmed. I want you to feel excited about the significance you actually hold in your child’s life.


Here’s the truth we need to understand: Only a small part of your 3000 hours is spent directly teaching and mentoring your kids. A significant percentage of your 3000 hours, is spent indirectly influencing your kids. It’s called passive parenting. The majority of your influence as a parent lies in the moments when you’re not actively “teaching” your kids anything.


Passive parenting is what your kids are learning about life from watching you when you’re tired, angry, frustrated, disappointed, late, etc. Leverage your life to model how you want your kids to live.


Galatians 5:23 says self-control is a fruit of the Holy Spirit being active in our lives. How you live always outweighs what you say. Your passive parenting will communicate more than your active parenting. You have 3,000 hours in a year. You have about 1,000 weeks with your child before they graduate. Whether you have all 1,000 left, or just a handful, use them well.

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